Z.

ur so pretty ( wasia project )

I.

I've met someone today. Well, I meet a lot of people, but he is different. It seems as if he's not falling for what everyone else seems to focus on whenever they meet me. He's nice and interested in the town's history and all occult. We've had a chat and the way he listened... It's not the same. He cared about the contents, rather than the lips that spoke them. And I could have listened to him without end, too. He says there might be something in the woods - apart from me. That's strange, I surely would have noticed, wouldn't I? But perhaps we'll find out. I hope he stays a bit. I like his attention, he seems to have a lot of that. Can't be too selfish to get a small percentage of that. isaiah. Sounds nice.

isaiah has found strange symbols within these woods. this can't be the work of my family, the symbols are not even making sense. he assumes it's a hidden message. but why would anyone leave that? what's the point? did someone expect isaiah to find it? this is worrisome. we'll look into it tonight. despite this, I enjoy this. He came to share it with me, even though he needn't to do that.but he did.

they are talking to me. why? this doesn't make sense. what do they know? how could they know about my family?nothing ever comes without a price, what are they asking for? who needs to come home?...can they really help me?

“ I'm just happy you're here. ”

i've never seen somthing something like this. it's quiet, yet loud.it seems to have an effect on what's deep insde inside. fears, worries, sorrow, grief.
if you are lost, he'll find you, be drawn to you.it's physical and yet it is not. where does it come from? why is it here? is it my fault?please don't hurt him.

we've went to edinburgh today, probably the best day I ever had in a long time. Probably the best one in general. Isaiah knows so much about art, it was mesmerizing to listen to him. I could have spent hours upon hours with him at the museum.

afterwards we met jemma to see "the shining". unsurprisingly, never had heard of that movie before and I probably would have enjoyed it far more if it hadn't been, well, for the set-up. i'll be completely honest with you... I would have loved to be alone with Isaiah. He didn't seem to enjoy himself that much. was that my fault?

I've been feeling things these past days I haven't felt in my entire life. All is different now, somehow. As if the sun shines after years of darkness and rain. I'm excited each day I wake up and I can't wait to see him. He's kissed me, did I tell you that? He kissed me, oh suns he has kissed me and I think about kissing him all the damn time. I can't believe I ever kissed anyone and didn't know what it could be truly like. Like sunshine, like meadows, like the smell of rain, like seeing a shooting star, like solitude, like safety, like being understood. I knew his lips are mesmerising the minute he started talking to me. I wish this would never end. But will he kiss me when he knows what I am? I want him to discover me. I don't want this to ever stop...

Z.

i need you most of all ( stephen sanchez )

I.

He's beautiful, isn't he? I can't wrap my head around how lucky I am, that for all that has happened in the past I'm still allowed to have peace like that. A love as pure and honest as this one. he's my sun, my stars and all things beautiful about this universe. I would give him anything and he doesn't even have to ask. For him I'd move mountains. I'm scared to lose any of this, but that's the price of love and for once I like being scared if it means I can spend my life with him. The future has never looked so bright. Did I tell you how beautiful he is? and generous, compassionate, diligent, courageous, empathetic, loyal, passionate, stunning, enthusiastic, inspiring, motivating, caring, enchanting, smart, patient, sincere, gorgeous, spectacular, brilliant, vibrant, honest, captivating.... honestly, the list is endless.

I'm glad we met.

not only is living in the states not as scary as I imagined it to be, it also has widen my horizon tremendously. i've experienced so many firsts that I've missed out. Cinema and restaurant dates, kissing in front of a fireplace, owning a cat, having a dad, building snow castles, summers at the beach, lazy sundays, a new job, even doing taxes, insanely amazing sex, long car rides, discovering cities, sightseeing, museum dates. I enjoy mundane things, cause he makes them special; grocery shopping, cooking, doing laundry, cleaning up. Isn't it funny, how romantic a life can be with the right person? When I wake up next to him, when the sun shines just right through the window, I never fail to smile and think: this is what happiness feels like.

This is probably the biggest love-letter I ever wrote to you and even though I got a lot to say, no words will ever truly capture what you've sparked in me and continue to do so. I'm insanely proud of what you've accomplished and what you will in the future. I'll always be there to support you, to cheer you on and to remind you of how great of a person you are, especially in moments you don't see it for yourself. You're so much more than you give yourself credit for and whenever I'm looking at you I'm in awe, loss at words (unbelievable I know) and filled with so much love for you, it's hard to contain. You've seen me when nobody else did and for that I'll be forever grateful. Being seen by you feels like being a star in our galaxy. I'll shine brightest for you and you only.

michigan was supposed to be just another stop. Just another place to see and forget. how funny that fate had different plans. how the stars seemed to have aligned, how the universe suddenly felt like granting me an ounce of happiness after months of uncertainty. you came and you never left me ever since. you welcomed me with a warmth I wasn't used to. to belong somewhere can be scary, to know things will change within a small time span had some sort of safety. to not get attached, to not let anyone close, to avoid getting hurt. But I couldn't have avoided you, you were entangled in my soul before I even knew it. and I've never felt this much joy just to belong. to you. I miss you, but I don't regret a single moment we had shared. I just wish we had more. I miss you and I hate the cold.